I Can’t Live Without You. Literally!

I spent the weekend In Manchester with my beautiful nephew Jr. Honestly that baby is cute and doesn’t cry much!


I met up with a friend of mine, he told me this true story over a drink.
The weekend before last, he met one of his friend’s for a drink. They talked and talked and talked! This friend was on about the way he was going to get married to the woman he’d been living with for am not sure how long.

The were engaged!

Thing is this guy was being delusional cos they’d broken up the engagement and the chic had asked him to move out. He asked for time to sort himself out. On tuesday after the sato he was with my friend, he hang himself! I mean the guy is now DEAD!

At what point in ones life, do you decide you can’t LIVE without the person you love? I honestly hope and pray that no one reading this has ever considered suicide as an escape. If you have, please cast out that lie that the devil has planted in your heart!

Our magical HIV tests!

I was also thinking about the way you go out..meet someone, start dating, have sex using a condom, have some more sex using condoms…..then….. we become doctors and nurses and have sex without protection.
At what time in a relationship do you somehow have a magical test and decide your partner isn’t HIV positive? I think we’re plain stupid!

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25 Responses to I Can’t Live Without You. Literally!

  1. threetypesofcrazy says:

    So I read the title of the post and I was like ,” aaawwwwww she has finally admitted it, she really can’t live with out ME” Tihiiiiii

    I had it drummed in my head that suicide was the cowards way out, it’s the easy option.But I am not sure, I can see how it is the easy option but how do you plan your last minutes on earth. That I can’t get past, for example, if you were going to hang yourself, is it strength/cowardice/ courage/stupidity that makes you tie the whatever you are using then put it round your neck.What about all the other people who love you? So suicide becomes selfish. Is Suicide selfish? And here I see a post is developing here. Anyway either way, I love life too much and life loves me.

    I had a friend who committed suicide over her lover and she left a note.And somehow her funeral was unusually difficult, I kept asking myself, “D, how did you swallow all those tablets, how low must you have been”. Hardest bit for her family, she did it in her room, everyone was home.


    Unless you get HIV through blood transfusion, as an unborn baby, or your spouse brings it home to you…………………any other means of contracting it is by “stupid”.
    Until we get rid of the “it can’t happen to me”mentality, we are a perishing generation, because” it can happen to me” and if you are not CAREFUL, it will.

  2. Xs says:

    After reading the two post (FG & 3ToC) my head is still reeling………

    We have different ways of handling our emotions and it gets worse when we use our ‘heart’ instead of our brains….

    For HIV, thats a difficult Qtn but FG you are right on target. We need to be more careful.. but again as u said ‘we are plain stupid’ This might last awhile. LOL

  3. A friend of mine committed suicide sometimes back coz his wife was leaving him. I had a drink with him a few days before that and he did not even hint to the contemplation. The lady moved on so fast after that and now she is even married to someone else.

    I take suicide to be cowardice of the highest order.

    I believe we should control our urges early to go for a HIV test even before we use a condom. I always do that..

  4. Kafai says:

    The truth is I have never understood how one comes to the decision that suicide is the way to solve stuff or whatever. I just don’t get it totally.
    On HIV most people say “but I trust him”. The number of times I have heard that from people I used to think possess a brain, eish it is sad. I am not sure how I will ever have kids coz I do not see myself ever having sex without a condom, the horror of it all!

  5. Gishungwa says:

    You said it right that its a lie that the devil implants in your heart as a way out. It doesn’t solve anything if not bringing more problems. I pray that we will always find ways to solve problems or at least talk to someone who had our best interests at heart.

    Magical test hmmm God help us.

  6. Kirima says:

    Suicide is the ultimate selfish act, by resorting to that a person thinks that he/she is taking revenge on those who hurt them but unfortunately life goes on without them. I would hate to imagine someone I know making such a decision.
    On those magical tests yes this happens all the time even after doing it only twice you assume all is good but quite frankly those magic tests just DON’T work so don’t try if you want to live, the real test is quick and free!

  7. muthii fulani says:

    shaking head…sad

  8. Shamza says:

    Ok, that was so sad (suicide guy).
    On magical test…..yes, we are plain stupid. Infact it even fikas a point the guy (or chic) decided that they’ve used ‘ndoms long enuf and they think it’s time to ‘start trusting each other’. Which is all good BTW, but does that mean the virus (if was there) has suddenly ‘died’. Mmmmh… it’s way easier getting AIDS than people actually think. Thats why you find folks surprised that they’ve been faithful to each other BUT contracted AIDS anyway,s coz they actually never got tested b4 the 1-3 yrs they went out.

  9. Eff Dee Eye says:

    I’m listening to this song by Tank “Kill 4 U”
    People do crazy stuff for love (again hard to define what love is)

    Trying to make you realise
    That i wanna love you for life
    How can i make you see
    You’re the only one for me
    Things you’ve never had before
    I give you them and so much more
    I would go as far as you need
    Just to make you see

    Life’s still precious!

  10. modoathii says:

    IDIOT! for suicide lovers.

    every problem has a solution and suicide ain’t it.

    IDIOTS! for magicians.

  11. kip says:

    sad ,sad sad. life is just wierd with its twists and turns,,

  12. udi says:

    Listen to K-CI and Jojo’s song “Suicide”. It will give u a better perspective on why people might resort. We might be quick to think its idiotic and crazy, but who are we to fathom what emotions another individual goes through.

    LMAO @ we become doctors and nurses. Wrap it up people. We all ignorant to AIDS until it happens to you.

  13. Mocha! says:

    When you are insane…..anything is possible, even flying. So, to me I think when you take your life….its a moment of insanity that unfortunately you can’t come back to tell the tale. This is one of those catch 22 events in life that can’t be explained fully.

    For example, the jumpers of twin towers, samson in the bible, the jamaa in your story, etc. Life is just funny like that!!!

    As for sex bila socks……there is no way I am doing it and we haven’t been to the REAL docs. As much as I hate needles, blood as to be drawn before you jab me bila protection.

  14. 3N says:

    It is impossible to tell what goes through anyone’s mind prior to committing suicide. I think one feels boxed in and the whole world crashing in on them with nobody lending a hand or words of encouragement to live on.

    And for someone to kill themselves over love / marriage – that is just unbelievable to me. There are 6 plus billion people on this earth and I don’t think God put only ONE person for you to live with or choose death if not possible.

    All being said though, I would not call anyone who commits suicide a coward. Maybe not brave either but it must take guts to go over such a thought and plan and do it, quite sad really.

    On the lighter topic of sockless, its stupid but it has happened to the best of us at one time. BTW, if one’s partner is tested and results are negative does the other partner REALLY need to take the test him or herself?

  15. Zack says:

    Did someone once say love is blind? Well, I guess somewhere some people get “blind” and their interpretation of that phrase leads them to do such crazy acts…like not seeing the gift of life.

    In the same breath;-I believe when we grow tite in love and emotions are high…we become blind and stop seeing the condoms…lol…But as @Xs says…This will last a while.

  16. bryjoe says:

    m y best friend committed suicide(drank poison) on the 7th of this mnoth.
    strange coz she was always happy..guess there is a bottom people reach that leads them to that.

  17. Klara says:

    Udi is right, sometimes we are quick to judge but each one of us has a different way of handling hard situations..The best we can do is try understand them & why they did it…Suicide is a sad thing especially if someone did it & and left behind a family that Loved him/her..
    Anyway enough said It’s no worthy to commit suicide coz of a broken heart… Coz one can always Move on, no matter how painful & how Long it takes…

  18. sisbigbones says:

    As someone that’s lost my best friend to suicide, I will side with you there. If you are THINKING it, please don’t. It’s a very selfish thing to do, no matter what the reason. Yes, there are days when life seems unbearable and you wish for the swift hand of death to literally choke you, but there’s always a way out. One that doesn’t involve hurting those that love you.

    As for those condoms, wacha tu. Trusting your partner is big, but please be real. If you know your man is the kind that’s had roaming hands/eyes/penis/whatever in the past, don’t think that you’re the magic kitty that’ll somehow change him. Be honest with yourself and be wise about the choices you make. Hata kama alikuwa virgin, HIV test lazima.

  19. sisbigbones says:

    Yeah, I just noticed that my condom comment comes across as sexist in the assumption that it’s the guys that cheat, but, I was thinking about myself while making the comment. So gents, insert the male nouns where the female ones are 🙂

  20. brotherjero says:

    Hi there farmgal…. Hope you are good..

    Skinny dipping is a question of trust and we trust easy and after a while we are convinced that our partners even after their tests that they are clean.

    A fine line to walk and a scary one…

    That’s why when I get my little clean grass patch, I set camp and chew there for a while and keep watering it to keep it lush before thinking of the next move..

    Take care..

  21. frankie says:

    Farmgal, people do all sorts of things in the name of love.
    I know some chicks in this campo who have gone to some tall hostel around (called Comfy) ati to commit suicide by jumping…and some actually died…

    It is sad…how can people kill themselves? One minute they are alive and breathing, and the next they are no more..

  22. mwari says:


    That’s the best line I have read in a long time! Thanks 3TOC!

    It is very sad when people we know commit suicide, least of all, over love gone sour. I think there is so much more to life. What happened to pursuit of hobbies, expoloring the world, or even helping make the world a better place?

  23. Unyc says:

    i never understand why peeps just go ahead and commmit suicide bcoz of some1!! That is just stupid in my opinion. Nobody can take the place of oxygen which u cant live without.

  24. amelia82 says:

    my dad committed suicide and i cant say even i undersatnd suicide.when i ws 15 i attempted suicide, but i wiser now.i think at that particular moment, you are so depresed andyou feel(believe) your life is over and all you want to do is die, its selfish, because you dont think of what otehrs will go through, you just think of you.its also the highest from of cowardice

  25. Ian925 says:

    I think people have a one sided and common misconception about suicide. That is because only the living are around to capture the tragedy. Obviously, no one does it who is happy, but does anyone stop to think about the level of pain the victim is experiencing. What if it is really so high that it is unbearable. If you knew someone was in the greatest level of pain, or if you were yourself, wouldn’t you want mercy. To some people Love is the most important thing. Love gets them up in the morning because of stacked bills, close ended jobs, etc. There is no cure for that mentality or pain of losing your lover. And as far as suicide goes, You are either capable or You are not. You take away love and you take away acceptance and safety or comfort. It’s horrible, especially if the bond was appreciated on such a high level. Either way you have taken away this persons backbone, because seemingly the most important person or influence is gone and when combined with lifes issues, it makes life meaningless. Who wants 40-50 years of nothing but pure agony. Why do you think some people actually re-attempt it. Because they got a second chance, they never wanted, the issues never left, and they still felt the same if not worse. Now people who don’t understand or have any compassion call them losers, weak, stupid, or cowards. It’s not something of stupidity and it’s certainly not bravery. It’s something of desperation because they are taking a dangerous leap, sometimes literally, praying that what’s on the other end is less painful. And hopefully for those who have commited suicide it’s not worse and god has taken mercy on their soul. No one should hurt that bad, but it happens. There are many gifts god has given us. One is llfe and another is love. Ask yourself what life is like without love, because for many they are hand in hand. What’s the purpose. I think some do it to be with god not because they don’t believe in him. Because they are hoping god will correct all, and they can smile once again. Laugh once again. Rest once again. Think about if someone has a completely trashed life, or seemingly so. The person you love turns their back. That would crush anyone and you tell someone experiencing it that there is someone else out there or the world still loves them. You’re a burden or a loser already and if you commit suicide, people are gonna trash you anyways. Some people aren’t strong enough to live it or overcome it. When the primary person you care for is removed and that person is what has kept them going, life doesn’t care anymore. Coming home and being held or being shown affection is a special bond, because it’s not something that has to happen and not everyone finds a love. It’s different from Family. It’s not something you are born into and therefor the bond is closer because life made it happen and reliance on the other person becomes very strong. It’s not the same as calling a relative. Sometimes people need to be held in that type of way and thats why it can be such a tormenting loss. As for methods… there are many and different people have access to different things. No doubt some do it to cause pain, some to try and prove a point, some because they have no hope, but all the same I do somewhat agree it’s an irreversible point of insanity, but it’s driven by desperation. I believe that almost always there is one person to each person that could have affected the outcome. To the guy who stated that there are other things like hobbies and or traveling the world. No one wants to do it alone, no matter what they say. Put the love of their life next to them through the whole thing and then without, they would pick whatever it is with their love. Once you have experienced it you can not go back to normal life. If you think you can and think you even have, then that person is was not the love of your life. Just the person you loved the most and thats enough damage for most people. Maybe they went through a lot just to get to that person in the first place. It’s a very sad situation and people are capable when hope is lost.

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