Gasp!!! Yes I said it!
I was watching some talk show the other day and was shocked to see 13-15yr old girls saying that they were actively wanting to be pregnant. I think people who don’t already have a baby don’t a clue the hard work, sleepless nights, excessive crying, etc that one has to put up with. If you think your baby will not cry like so and so’s baby then allow me to put a pin in that bubble and deflate it!
When you think you want to have a baby, do it for the right reasons. That means, you want a baby for yourself and not because
1. you want to trap a man into marrying you.
2. I love him so much I want to have his babies.
3. He’ll stop staying out late when we have a baby. (works the other way round in most cases)
4. He’ll be more responsible and caring.
5. I want my carbon copy or his.
etc etc add-on to this …
When you decide to bring a child into this world, you need to be mentally ready. Only then can you face the challenges of being a parent without wishing the baby away. You also do need a good support system, this is the one time being an island will work against you terribly. If you’re rich or if you’re in a country where house-help is affordable, then luck is on your side. for those of us who live in foreign lands where the just the thought of hiring someone renders you broke, then you’re in big trouble.I find it useful to have someone you can hand the baby over to especially when they won’t stop crying..Even if you had lots of money to hire a day and night helper, seriously do you want your baby raised by nannies?
Talking of crying, that’s the only way babies know to communicate. If they are hungry, wet, sleepy, tired, bored etc They will let you know by crying and it’s up to you to figure out what’s up! They have no mute button and shouting at them to shut it doesn’t work!
Unfortunately its mums who have to do a lot of the ‘taking care of the baby’ Can you imagine you giving birth and going back to work and leaving the daddy to do all the work.It’s funny just thinking about it..it’s sad but most dads play dead when the baby wakes up in the night…either that or they will go sleep on the sofa or the spare room. Some dads only handle their babies when they are fed, clean and quiet. One little sound from them and they hand the bundle of joy straight back to you. A friend told me when she was potty training her child. One time when she was making her family dinner, her baby did a poo and ended up touching and covering himself with poo. She called out to her daddy to give the kid a wash cos she was busy in the kitchen. The dad on was the comp ..he asked her why she was doing two things at the same time. She had to switch the stove off to clean her baby
I probably should have started with the bit after you get preggers. I was watching my wife and kids. The one where Jr gets Vanessa pregnant and the dad is trying to ready him to be a parent by giving him a balloon full of water.The balloon is his child and the dad is the child’s voice…the best advice his dad gave him was to change his name to jackass. Why? You see, when a woman is pregnant, she becomes like an alien. She has all his conflicting hormones which is like PMS x infinity. That’s the first three months and this is when you need to as a dad to be-do as she tells you. don’t try to understand her cos she doesn’t understand what’s going on. Dads to be, this is when you think you married the devil..the second trimester is not too bad and if you’re lucky she wants a lot of sex the in the last trimester it’s back to the irritations of the first trimester. And now I know that being pregnant is not as difficult as raising a child.
If you’re thinking of having a child think, raging hormones, strained relationship, humongous boobs, ugly bras, putting on weight, spending time with you head in the toilet bowl, cravings, swollen feet, getting out of shape, night shifts, feeding, changing nappies, being puked on etc
I can’t explain to you the joy of having those little hands wrapped around your finger and how warm I feel in my heart when my baby smiles at mummy. I can’t wait for her to call me mum and tell me that she loves me! Being a parent is awesome.