Babies aren’t always a bundle of joy

Gasp!!! Yes I said it!
I was watching some talk show the other day and was shocked to see 13-15yr old girls saying that they were actively wanting to be pregnant. I think people who don’t already have a baby don’t a clue the hard work, sleepless nights, excessive crying, etc that one has to put up with. If you think your baby will not cry like so and so’s baby then allow me to put a pin in that bubble and deflate it!

When you think you want to have a baby, do it for the right reasons. That means, you want a baby for yourself and not because
1. you want to trap a man into marrying you.
2. I love him so much I want to have his babies.
3. He’ll stop staying out late when we have a baby. (works the other way round in most cases)
4. He’ll be more responsible and caring.
5. I want my carbon copy or his.
etc etc add-on to this …

When you decide to bring a child into this world, you need to be mentally ready. Only then can you face the challenges of being a parent without wishing the baby away. You also do need a good support system, this is the one time being an island will work against you terribly. If you’re rich or if you’re in a country where house-help is affordable, then luck is on your side. for those of us who live in foreign lands where the just the thought of hiring someone renders you broke, then you’re in big trouble.I find it useful to have someone you can hand the baby over to especially when they won’t stop crying..Even if you had lots of money to hire a day and night helper, seriously do you want your baby raised by nannies?

Talking of crying, that’s the only way babies know to communicate. If they are hungry, wet, sleepy, tired, bored etc They will let you know by crying and it’s up to you to figure out what’s up! They have no mute button and shouting at them to shut it doesn’t work!

Unfortunately its mums who have to do a lot of the ‘taking care of the baby’ Can you imagine you giving birth and going back to work and leaving the daddy to do all the work.It’s funny just thinking about it..it’s sad but most dads play dead when the baby wakes up in the night…either that or they will go sleep on the sofa or the spare room. Some dads only handle their babies when they are fed, clean and quiet. One little sound from them and they hand the bundle of joy straight back to you. A friend told me when she was potty training her child. One time when she was making her family dinner, her baby did a poo and ended up touching and covering himself with poo. She called out to her daddy to give the kid a wash cos she was busy in the kitchen. The dad on was the comp ..he asked her why she was doing two things at the same time. She had to switch the stove off to clean her baby

I probably should have started with the bit after you get preggers. I was watching my wife and kids. The one where Jr gets Vanessa pregnant and the dad is trying to ready him to be a parent by giving him a balloon full of water.The balloon is his child and the dad is the child’s voice…the best advice his dad gave him was to change his name to jackass. Why? You see, when a woman is pregnant, she becomes like an alien. She has all his conflicting hormones which is like PMS x infinity. That’s the first three months and this is when you need to as a dad to be-do as she tells you. don’t try to understand her cos she doesn’t understand what’s going on. Dads to be, this is when you think you married the devil..the second trimester is not too bad and if you’re lucky she wants a lot of sex the in the last trimester it’s back to the irritations of the first trimester. And now I know that being pregnant is not as difficult as raising a child.

If you’re thinking of having a child think, raging hormones, strained relationship, humongous boobs, ugly bras, putting on weight, spending time with you head in the toilet bowl, cravings, swollen feet, getting out of shape, night shifts, feeding, changing nappies, being puked on etc

I can’t explain to you the joy of having those little hands wrapped around your finger and how warm I feel in my heart when my baby smiles at mummy. I can’t wait for her to call me mum and tell me that she loves me! Being a parent is awesome.

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11 Responses to Babies aren’t always a bundle of joy

  1. yellasoul says:

    lol…i like how uv added the last paragraph…sort of like a disclaimer like you’re not the one who just said all of the above nasties about babies…hehehe :-)…woishe…aki now you have me scared silly vile my bestest pal is pregnant and reason why she wanted a baby is cos they are cute.yap.that’s the reason….if its all what uv said,then there’s a way she might want to hand it right back and leave…lol

    • farmgal says:

      that’s a sad reason to have a baby…there’s a mother who goes to the same clinic I go to. she wants to have a baby with a black man so her baby can look like mine. Mind you my baby is all black! silly woman

  2. 3toc says:

    Sleepless nights????? Someone is going to take care of my babies at night. I need my sleep.LOL

  3. hahahaha yeah I agree. After two kids and being the man, I know…

    That woman may be wanting the father of your child………

    naija? You went there. Was there too in June and yes its a country full of contras… You are either too rich or too stinking poor…..

  4. mrembo says:

    Good post. Very good post. Especially about the support system, then being a mum away from your home country. Then the househelp thing. Identified with the post all the way.

    I remember once when my first born was about 3 weeks old or there about. I was in shock at the sleep deprivation thing. Shock and anger.. I woke up one night and very seriously said to hubby ” I am returning this child to the hospital cause I just cannot be dealing with this shit”

    Hubby woke up picked baby and tried to comfort him while I got myself together…

    When I hear about mothers who just “snapped” I so understand.. cause there are moments when I have been known to walk away from the crying child.. cause I’m this close to snapping!

    Baby number 2 is a little easier cause you know about the sleep thing.. gotta tell you that sleep thing is still a shock to the system… ok.. so you probably can tell I have not been sleeping too well…hehehe…. I does get better. Truly it does.

  5. Digzer says:

    Nice & informative post. My 2 pals:
    One wants a child coz she’s 30-something and just can’t see a man in the horizon and a baby’s the next best thing … The other got a child when she turned 30 for the same reasons. She loves her baby but wishes she could turn back the hands of time and kick herself. I’ll introduce them to each other …

  6. jean says:

    my boyfriend has been pestering me for a baby and i just feel like im not ready. So trust me this post is God sent. Im so glad i landed on it today and read it.

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