If you are trying to get some (guest post)

aaand you have a huzzy…
So it is like 2 years into the marriage, and the last time you got some was last year in December around Christmas! Nowadays he went even touch you even look at you, why? Of late you look like you have been hit by a truck! I’m talking about shabbiness here the whole taking care of yourself shebang! You look like a 100litre drum (the ones used in building and construction), occupy three quarters of the bed then you expect him to want some of you?
You were once a ravishing, voluptuous member of the female species who used to command lengthy ogles wherever you went even in the seedy joints of River wood. Now you look similar to number 1, “mtu hawezi jua kama unatembea nyuma ama mbele” unless he/she looks at your hands. Anyway let me stop with the ranting and give you some advice: don’t become a member of a gym, they are just money making ventures….jog for at least half an hour every morning, more cheaper that way, always walk whenever you have the chance to, get rid of those ugly tatters you wear in the bedroom, burn them in fact and vacuum the ashes! Get rid of the weave, it makes you look ridiculous and most men don’t trust women who rock weaves, something about multiple personalities but personally I hate them because of this high school teacher who used to don them term in term out! SMH! Last but not least Google the rest of the tips! It’s free after all!!
Have some today.


This post is in response to this post that I did a few weeks back. Thanks Ghafla!
Oh and he is part of the team (assuming it’s a team) that is making sure we don’t re-write music by bringing us the correct lyrics here

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12 Responses to If you are trying to get some (guest post)

  1. savvy says:

    He he.. that’s great advice for both genders! Check out this article: We need eye candy too.


  2. Project44 says:

    he he he ati who looks like number 1? 😦

  3. Ghafla!Guy says:

    He he..Thanks farmgal! Yeah will be providing quality and correct Kenyan lyrics for you guys papa hapa! 😉

  4. farmgal says:

    I don’t like weaves but this love hate relationship Kenyans have towards them sijui
    When let’s say Tyra or Miss Kelly Rowland rock em, it’s ga ga ga ga! Double standards much, no?

    Gents reading this, if your woman is struggling with losing weight. Encourage her by taking her for walkies and simple indoor exercises rather than tear into her.

  5. woolie says:

    Great post and interesting comments – the advice generally should apply to both sides especially when you consider the statistics – It makes sense to tidy up and generally keep fit. Remember 99.9% of people with partners die before their 110th birthday

  6. Odhiambo says:

    Its really awful having a bad day at work and when just about to leave for home… the eye-soaring picture you’ve described (You look like a 100litre drum (the ones used in building and construction), occupy three quarters of the bed then you expect him to want some of you?). Its good to carry oneself vi-poa, especially the married wenches… jogging na tizi za hapa na pale si kazi nguuuumu 😉

  7. ihuoma says:

    It goes both ways to be very honest. We should not be self centered to that extent and have such sad double standards. Alafu something else let us be honest and communicate. You, i.e the man might want me to be fit but do you want me to be skinny, to the bones… and the same applys to me l do not think l will be cool with all bones… it would be nice to to feel some meat. And know what it is that you like and what he likes and let us be generous, l know every day is not sunday but why does it have to be a special day for a gal to be getting some service? If l am taking care of myself, it should not be a problem ….. or is a gal missing something here?…..

  8. kbaab says:

    LOL! >>>…” a 100litre drum (the ones used in building and construction)…”.

    I’ll echo everyone saying the tips go both ways. I acknowledge that we have big bodied (fat is a rude word) people in the society and they ain’t going no where. Lakini regardless of the weight, the huffing and puffing after a few minutes into whatever physical task should be a no-no! Exercise is key and watch life magically transform. Doing it in pairs is even better. 🙂

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